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«A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'»
Author: Tommy Cooper
| About:
Dogs,
Funny
| Keywords:
alarmed, assistant, assistants, bloke, blokes, calls, Call for help, guide, guide dog, head start, Just Say No, picks, shop, shop assistant, sir, swinging, thanks, The Blind, The Dog, walks
«Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea.Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it.»
«I expect you'll be becoming a schoolmaster, sir. That's what most of the gentlemen does, sir, that gets sent down for indecent behaviour.»
Author: Evelyn Waugh
| Keywords:
behaviour, gentlemen, indecent, schoolmaster, schoolmasters, send down, sir, The Gentlemen
«Any coward can fight a battle when he's sure of winning, but give me the man who has pluck to fight when he's sure of losing. That's my way, sir; and there are many victories worse than a defeat.»
«A fly, Sir, may sting a stately horse, and make him wince; but one is but an insect, and the other is a horse still»
«BOSWELL: I do indeed come from Scotland, but I cannot help it . . . JOHNSON: That, Sir, I find, is what a very great many of your countrymen cannot help.»
Author: Samuel Johnson
(Critic, Poet, Writer)
| Keywords:
Boswell, countryman, countrymen, Johnson, Scotland, sir
«Ay, sir; to be honest, as this world goes, is to be one man picked out of ten thousand»
«A good old man, sir. He will be talking. As they say, when the age is in, the wit is out.»
«Foolery, sir, does walk about the orb like the sun; it shines everywhere.»
Author: William Shakespeare
(Dramatist, Playwright, Poet)
| Keywords:
fooleries, foolery, orb, orbs, shines, sir, walk about
«'You are drunk Sir Winston, you are disgustingly drunk. 'Yes, Mrs. Braddock, I am drunk. But you, Mrs. Braddock are ugly, and disgustingly fat. But, tomorrow morning, I, Winston Churchill will be sober.»
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